Longing for Love and Connection — Donna Hopkins

“Life, in its complex ebb and flow, often defies immediate classification as good or bad. Instead, it beckons us to focus on living and loving in the present, with hindsight providing the lens through which we truly comprehend the fullness of our growth and experiences.” —Brian Kanagaki

One minute I was walking along the sidewalk, camera across my body, arms swinging, head swiveling. The next minute I was sprawled out along the concrete, bloodied and bruised. I failed to notice an unexpected stepped up curb that was part of a cut-out for wheelchair access near the crosswalk. I didn’t fall down so much as trip up. Abrasions on my right hand, right knee and elbow. Bruise on right hip. Camera miraculously unharmed except for a small ding on the body; still working. I hobbled back to the car where my husband helped to clean me up and apply all of the emergency band aids he always carries in his wallet (that’s another story). Once I recovered from the initial shock of the fall, I realized my thumb and wrist were throbbing. One trip to Ortho On Call (truly an amazing facility) and an x-ray later, it looks like I have strained my CMC (carpometacarpal) joint. This joint is located at the base of the thumb and is involved in pinching and grasping. I will have a repeat x-ray this week to make sure there is no hidden fracture of one of the small bones in the area (the scaphoid bone). This is a very inconvenient injury for a photographer and her dominant hand. I am grateful that I was not more seriously injured and that my expensive camera survived, too!

I am supposed to be wearing a splint, but my hand hurts worse in the splint than out. So I am resting and avoiding overuse and the movements that cause pain. And taking a few pictures because this is the most healing thing I can do for myself. Always.

I am in the sweet spot where I take pictures of anything I notice or am drawn to and simply let the photos sit. I name them and cull them (though even this has changed; do I keep the photo with my fingers in focus and the wound in softer focus? maybe so.) I process the pictures a little here and there, making them suit my vision. I live with them. I wonder how they will weave themselves into future projects and collections. For now, I know they help me to feel love and connection. The things I long for.