I get book recommendations from lots of people and places, and I can’t recall where I came across this one, but I’m happy for the discovery.
In Tell Me More, Kelly Corrigan shares stories about the 12 hardest things she’s learning to say.
My favorites are her chapters on No, Yes, Tell Me more, Good Enough, and I Was Wrong.
Her words on the value of No spoke directly to me.
It’s not easy saying No. As I recently told my son, Jacob, “We mothers walk a tightrope. If we set boundaries and limits, we are viewed as selfish and uncaring. But if we give till there is nothing left and help at every turn, well then, we become martyrs for our suffering.” He laughed and gave me a hug. He knows this truth.
Kelly writes, “sometimes the art of relationship is declaring your limits, protecting your boundaries, and saying no.”
And this . . . “no makes room for yes, and who doesn’t want more room for that?”
I love this point of view. No gets a bad rap.
When I say No to impulsive spending I make way for Yes to wiser investments of my time and money.
When I say No to more gear and more gadgets, I make way for Yes to using all that I have already to the fullest potential. This means reading the books I already own and wearing the clothes I have in the closet.
And when I say No to expenses we can’t handle just now, like travel, I say Yes to the beauty along the path I travel every single day.
“Beauty abounds us in often the simplest of ways. And essentially this appreciation involves intimacy. A closeness and deep connection to an everyday moment of life. One in which we savour the experience of beauty.” —Chantelle Grady